Lary Bloom
Writer, Editor, Teacher
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Thursday, December 29, 2005
The Missing R
This week I got a note from a fellow who is also saddled with the same first name as mine. Like me, he has had to explain himself all his life -- offering that his mother, who wanted at all costs to avoid Lawrence, decided that Lary was the right choice. My correspondent had never come across anyone else with this handicap until he noticed a reference to my new book in a magazine.It's possible we had the same mother, though I doubt it. Mine never had sex. That would be the logical conclusion from the limited and awkward "conversations" about the subject that she and I had. But she did give me much the same story about Lawrence. I found that to be prosaic, and not worth mentioning to strangers at cocktail parties who persisted in discovering the origins of my unusual name. So, as the years progressed, and depending on the mood, I indulged them with a variety of theories.
1. I was born during the Second World War, a time of rationing.
2. My parents were poor and couldn't afford the second r.
3. In Vietnam, the second r was shot off.
I do recall that my eighth grade teacher, one Miss Elephante, chided me that I didn't know how to spell my own name. I thought anyone with a name like hers should probably just shut up.
There are other awkward moments, of course. A young man about to meet me was told by my parents that I have one R. He didn't hear it quite right. When I went to shake his hand, he tentatively offered his. I learned later that he was nervous about how to greet me. He thought I had one arm.
There are other Larys out there. As a matter of fact, there's a Lary Bloom in California, who must be getting, by mistake, all my annual winnings from the Lottery.
Posted by:Lary Bloom at 7:05 AM
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